| | OK, can somebody explain to me what series of thoughts would have to occur in a person's head to make them do the following?
1) Approach you after church and invite you to lunch.
2) Suggest a specific restaurant at which to eat lunch together.
3) Inform you that she's trying to find someone else who she wanted to invite to lunch as well so they could catch up, and then disappear while looking for that person.
4) Not answer her phone when you're attempting to call her to find out if she's gone to the restaurant yet.
5) Call you right when you get to the restaurant, only to tell you she ran into another group of people and decided to go out with them instead.
Seriously, it felt like I was still in high school, getting ditched at the last minute by "friends" who had planned to do something with me because they found a cooler group of friends to do stuff with, and I was just the contingency plan all along. Though in this case, the friend knows Christine better than she knows me, so Christine was really the one being snubbed. There was nobody else in our group. It was just the two of us. And I was so livid over the scatterbrained change of plans that I wasn't in the mood to pay over 10 bucks just to wait in line at Souplantation and sulk for an hour over my salad about how flaky this "friend" was. I figured I could sulk over cheap food at home.
As with most situations of this nature, I figure it's not really an intentional snub, or somebody ditching you because they think you're uncool. It's generally a matter of the person not thinking at all - just throwing out ideas on a whim and not realizing that you're taking their suggestion of "Hey, let's do this" as a definite plan. If I'd invited someone else to lunch and they'd absent-mindedly agreed, only to bail in favor of a better plan, it'd still be annoying, but I could let it go more easily, because it was my plan, not theirs. But I figure when you initiate something and the other person shows interest, you should either follow through on it or at least give the person enough advance warning if you have to bail that they won't be left without alternative options. We had said no to other folks we could have had lunch with by that point, so basically that meant we had waited around after church for nothing. A minor annoyance in the grand scheem of things, but it's an apt illustration of how cluelessly rude some people can be.
The kicker is that this friend supposedly has plans to go on a weekend trip with Christine to Colorado later this summer. Suddenly I realize that this'll probably never actually happen.
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| | Posted 6/28/2009 10:00 PM - 16 Views - 2 eProps - 2 comments
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